Weird/Nasty Pig-Human Hybrid Born In Guatemala After UFO Visits Village!!!

Not Unseeable Mutant Pig

We’ve all heard of cattle mutilation but what about cattle insemination? Sounds nasty, but that’s exactly what allegedly happened in a South American village, after a UFO was sighted wandering the skies the night the poor ugly swine bastard was born.

The little piggy, who did not feel well enough to go to the market, probably stayed at home and creeped out everyone there, leaving them scarred for life. Well, at least there is one good side to this story; no one was mutilated and everyone lived happily ever after. Except the little piggy.

Hit the break to read more and be severely disturbed by a video of the mutant-alien-pig-thing.

Comet Elenin Disintegrates And Emits Radio Signals!

Elenin Tetrahedral Forcefield

Remember that comet that was going to f*** us up in a month or so? Well, turns out Elenin is dissolving!!! Does that mean that we are saved? Not quite. You see, the plot thickens, just like the layer of dirt on my car. And no dear Paranoid reader, I am not going to wash it. I like my car like my women; Dirty. But I digress. Turns out that the comet not only is dissolving but it grew a tetrahedral forcefield of some sort!!! Did I mention that it is emitting radio signals too? Well, it is!! HOLY EXTRATERRESTRIAL MACKEREL!! This whole Elenin thing is getting more weird by the second! Hit the break to watch it get even weirder!

Could Extraterrestrials Be Behind The Nuclear Incident At Fukushima?

Handout satellite image of Fukushima Daiichi nuclear plant after earthquake and tsunami

All this time we all thought that the Illuminati or some other group of secretly associated fat cats were behind the  nuclear incident at the Fukushima nuclear power plant but what if they weren’t behind it? What if they had nothing to do with what happened to the Daiichi nuclear power plant?
Think about it for a minute. Why would they screw with their own habitat? Sure, they can leave the planet in an escape pod when they are done with it. But where would they go? Mars? Venus? God knows where is the nearest habitable planet and who or what populates it!
You know what makes a whole lot more sense? ALIENS!!!  What if the incident at Japan’s Fukushima Daiichi nuclear plant  is an elaborate alien plot to depopulate Earth? Hit the break and find out more.


Russian Town Famous For Its Numerous UFO Sightings Unveils Wooden Alien Monument!

Alien Monument In Russia

People around the world have built monuments for fallen soldiers, for lazy presidents, for poets and I think there’s even one for stupidity Snooki but in the Russian town of Molebka, they built a monument for the aliens! That’s right, the little gray men from outer space!
What made the inhabitants of Molebka think that aliens deserve a monument is beyond me but I can clearly see why they’ve chosen this town to build it.  The town of Molebka, also known as Molyobka (Russian: Молёбка) have quickly become a UFO hotspot in the last years with mysterious reports of UFO sightings, balls of light and even crop circles! I have no idea what’s bringing all that extraterrestrial activity to such small rural community but I can immediately smell something ratty going on even though I can’t quite put my finger on it. And as a matter of a fact I don’t want to put my finger on it. I don’t like things that smell ratty, only things that smell cheesy. :winkwink: *pops open a bag of cheetos*

Hit the break to watch a couple of videos and read more.

USA Government Getting Ready For An Extinction Level Event But The Public Doesn’t Know!!

Elenin Gonna Strike

What would you do if your friend organized a party and you were not invited? What if it was your government? I personally would be pissed off in either case but  American citizens seem to be okay with it, and no, I am not talking about a real party, it was a metaphor. Let me explain; The US government is mass-mobilizing ground troops in the upper Midwest, trucks, heavy artillery, guns, tanks you name it, it’s all there and they were moving it. They are not giving a reason or explanation for it.
The title of this video says it all “Something Catastrophic is Brewing in the USA”. Something catastrophic in deed. :arrow: :twisted:
There are several copies of the video (which I am going to show you after the break) floating around the web but the Author is a YouTube user called LoudCryProphecies. The video features several interviews with people who witnessed large movements of military troops in the upper Midwest. I tried to find more information about this obscene military display but that video is all there is to it, which raises the possibility of it being fake.
Most people posting this video claim that the military is preparing for the comet Elenin, but then again, what do they need the big guns for? perhaps it’s just a parade of people with small penises, that would explain the big guns.

Hit the break for more. A LOT MORE!

Holy Extraterrestrial Guacamole!! There’s A UFO Approaching Behind The Comet Elenin!!

Elenin Comet UFO

If you remember, I posted like a month ago about a comet called Elenin. Yes, the same one that has been causing all these earthquakes and the exact same one that is going to wreak havoc in a few months. Turns out a new piece of the puzzle emerged. Apparently there is a fleet of UFOs following the comet!!! YES! You read right, a fleet of UFOs!!! As in Extraterrestrial Vehicles!!! Why are they following a comet, I don’t know maybe they are playing intergalactic musical chairs around the solar system but the fact that NASA is getting ready for a major catastrophic event seriously creeps me out because all these flashbacks of alien invasion movies start to rush through my head. You know what I’m saying? Me neither. If we get invaded tho, you don’t know me.
Now, I know what you are thinking and this time it’s not some doofus with a YouTube account but an actual astronomer who is endorsing this claim, so yeah, there’s actually a bigger chance that this is not just a false alarm. I would start preparing if I were you.

Hit the break to read more and get Paranoid.

Roswell UFO Was Piloted By Russian Mutant Midgets, Not Actual Aliens!!

Russian Mutant Midget

What were three Russian mutant midgets doing on American soil? If you answered working in the sideshow of a circus you are wrong, ’cause they were piloting a UFO. And in case you wonder, no, I’m not kidding or drunk (yet).
In what appears to be a twist straight out of the TV series The X-Files, turns out that the alleged aliens from the Roswell UFO Incident are not even actual aliens but extremely deformed little people (Not actual picture above). Not only that, but according to investigative journalist Annie Jacobsen the UFO spacecraft that crashed in Roswell, New Mexico was sent by the Russian government to spy on the US. Or something like that, I don’t know. Hit the break to read more.

Impressive Leaked UFO & Gray Alien Footage, Is It Real This Time Or Just Another Hoax?

Gray Alien Video

Just weeks after the mysterious disclosure about alien life by the US government, two videos were released to the public from an unknown source, featuring flying saucers and live gray aliens caught on tape doing what they do best! (looking creepy)
To be more specific, one of the videos shows a gray alien creature and the other shows what appears to be a crashed flying saucer a.k.a. UFO. Almost like out of an X-Files episode! I gotta tell you folks, this is the most realistic footage posted here yet, almost too good to be true. And I am not the only one who thinks that, the author of the source article where I found this two videos explains that it could be a Hollywoodesque  marketing stunt to ‘viralize’ a trailer for a gray-alien-related movie where the main character gets repeatedly ass-probed. In other words: Fake and most definitely gray gay. Mostly gay. I mean, ass-probing? That can’t be not gay.
Freudian slips aside, footage like this has been ‘leaking’ to the public since forever and a lot of these were proved to be elaborate hoaxes. Is it real this time? Hit the break to watch both videos and decide for yourself!

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