Author Archives: Jhonny Paranoid

Sign Of The End Of Times: A Ring Of Fire Will Be Seen In The Sky On May 20th!!!

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Ring Of Fire Sun

As I mentioned earlier in a previous post, we are going to have a solar eclipse on May 20th, also a planetary alignment which, According to Mexican UFOlogist Jaime Maussan will herald the end of times, but that is not the end of the story! I mean, why should it end with just one eclipse and a planetary alignment if you can have a giant-ass ring of fire in the sky!!! How is that for a sign of the end of times, huh?! Now you can confidently go outside and yell “THE END IS NEAR, WE’RE ALL GONNA DIE!!!” while you run down the street with your arms up in the air, completely freaked out of your mind! Because, let’s face it, what says more “The world is going to end soon!” than a giant ring of fire in the sky!?
Hit the break to read more and make your peace with God have a booze-powered hedonistic party!

Argentinian Prophet Predicted Something [Bad] Happening During The Olympics!!!

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Benjamin Solari Parravicini - Olympics Prophecy

Benjamin Solari Parravicini was an Argentinian painter and  sculptor who is better known for drawing a series of prophetic sketches that predicted the downfall of Hitler, the assassination of Kennedy and even the 9/11 terrorist attacks among many other things. Much like Nostradamus, this guy also predicted mostly in riddles but some of his drawings were very precise, pointing details such as the location and date of the predicted event.
So why am I talking about  Parravicini you might ask? Why didn’t I mention him earlier if he was such a famous prophet? Well, you see, I knew this guy since the early 90′s which is when I read about him in a magazine and I saw most of his drawings but I had no idea what Parravicini’s drawings meant, I honestly didn’t know what to make of them. Fortunately, other people have a better understanding of Parravicini’s work and are way better than yours truly at decoding the meaning behind this drawings. One of those people is YouTube user  La Gazzetta del Apocalipsis, who has a clue about what one of those drawings could mean!! And let me tell you something, Folks, from what I understand the future is full of scary things!!!

Hit the break to watch a video and learn more!!

Pyramid-Shaped UFO Spotted Over Cambridge, Ontario!

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Pyramid UFO

They are back! And by “they” I mean “I-have-no-idea-who”. All I know is “they” travel on pyramid-shaped space ships. Who am I talking about? Sirian aliens, of course! As you may or may not remember, a couple of years ago we had a rash of pyramid-shaped UFO sightings, especially in the Russia/China area. According to Chinese [extra]officials these pyramidal ships were manned alienned by Sirian aliens (which for those of you who don’t know means aliens from the Sirius star system), who by the way,  happen to be aquatic creatures! But what does this mean for us? I have no idea whatsoever. Hit the break to read more.


Doomsday Forecast: May The 20th Is The Beginning Of The End!!!

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Return Of Kukulkan Crop Circle

Does the end have a beginning? Yes, it does! And according to Mexican UFOlogist Jaime Maussan the end begins on May the 20th!! Maussan says that a major event is going to happen on May 20th, which will trigger the  chain of events that will culminate with the end of the world on December 21st. Maussan is basing this prediction on an interesting crop circle depicting the Mayan calendar and a solar eclipse. The crop circle supposedly predicts or announces the return of the Mayan god Kukulkan (not afiliated with the KKK or anything), also known in the Aztec culture as Quetzalcoatl.  As to what is actually going to happen those days, I have no idea but I advise you to keep your eyes open for any sign of cataclysm. Just in case.

Hit the break to read more and watch a video with an explanation, also, get Paranoid!

Actual Men In Black Spotted In A Building, Caught On Security Camera!!!

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Men In Black

Remember that one time when you saw the UFO crash with the aliens coming out of the wreckage with their asses lit on fire? No, no you don’t. Of course you don’t! The Men In Black came and f***ed your mind up with the flashy thing and now you don’t remember. And you would never ever find out they were there unless they got caught on some sort of security camera. Which is exactly what happened here. These folks went to f*** someone up erase someone’s mind and they couldn’t find him, so they had to leave (HA HA HA!! LOSERS!!!).
The witness(es) describe these folks as odd looking, hairless, pale men wearing black suits. Very much like the descriptions from John Keel’s book The Mothman Prophecies!!

Hit the break for a video and explanation.

Popocatepetl Erupts, My House Is Actually In Danger!!!

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Popocatepetl Volcano

As many of you know, I moved to Mexico a number of years ago and I’ve been living here ever since in a small and quiet town where nothing much happened. That is until last week, when the Popocatepetl, which is our nearest volcano  started spewing lava and smoke.

Now, for those who don’t know, the Popocatepetl is a volcano located in the states of Puebla, Mexico, and Morelos, in Central Mexico. It is one of the tallest peaks in Mexico. The name Popocatepetl comes from a native tongue called Nahuatl and means “Smoking Mountain”, although locals call it “Don Goyo”. I call it Explode-catepetl since this morning, because it looks like it’s going to blow up at any moment!
And normally, the Popocatepetl mostly releases water vapor emissions, gas and occasionally ash (just like me after a burrito dinner), but that was until last week. Now it’s vomiting hot lava and threatening to blow the neighboring towns and villages up to pieces.

Hit the break to read more about it and watch a video of the Popocatepetl in action!

Strange Monolith Photographed On Mars’ Surface!!!

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Mars Monolith

Scientists keep saying “there’s no life on Mars, never was and never will be”. Now this photo surfaces and they are all like “it’s just a roughly rectangular boulder”. Are you serious?  Rectangular boulder!? Where have you seen a boulder standing like that!? Moreover, I’ve never seen a rectangular boulder in my life, they are all irregular in shape. In fact my ass looks more rectangular than all the boulders I’ve seen! (Mostly from sitting all day on this tiny-ass, uncomfortable chair at work).
But seriously, Folks, that is the best explanation they came up with? “A  roughly rectangular boulder”?? I’m not even surprised really. After all they explain UFOs as “weather balloons” and “swamp gas refracting the light from Uranus”.

Hit the break to read more about what NASA has to say about this “roughly rectangular boulder “

I Don’t Believe A Word!: Earthquakes In The US Supposedly Caused By Wastewater Injection!

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Wastewater and Fracking Causes Eartquakes?

Remember how a few years ago scientists were all like “no, there’s no such thing as earthquake weather, earthquakes are not on the rise”? Well, guess what! They are now having second thoughts on that. Of course they are not going to admit they were wrong all along. Instead, they point out the fact that the recent rise in earthquake activity is linked to wastewater wells. Notice how they blatantly fail to mention anything about how they were wrong about earthquakes being on the rise after all and that there is such a thing as “earthquake weather”! They talk about it as if it was common knowledge!
And what is all this crap about wastewater anyways? Really!? What about volcanic activity? Is that one caused by wastewater too?  Also, this theory doesn’t explain why the rise in earthquake activity is global. In fact, I find more credible the idea that the recent rash in earthquake activity is caused by Satan’s fat-ass momma doing aerobics down at the center of the Earth or that the Mayans are practicing hard for December 21st!!! Because, we are forgetting a couple of things here: First off what’s up with all those strange Earth noises being recorded everywhere? And what about the sinkholes all around the world from a couple of years ago? Everyone seems to have forgotten all about those when talking about earthquake activity.  You know what I think? I think they are trying to cover up something. I just can’t pin-point what. Hit the break to learn more about this strange new theory about the wastewater causing a sudden rise in earthquake activity.

 

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