Have you ever had one of those old-ass computers that  freeze on you every 5 minutes for absolutely no reason? I used to have one until 20 minutes ago, I bashed the shit out of it with a baseball bat. Rest In Pieces Peace my old, freezing pentium-1 friend [insert video montage of me punching the screen happy moments here]. For those who share my pain of using old and outdated equipment, the reset button always comes as a blessing. Also for those who watch pr0n at work. Now, I don’t know if God watches pr0n at work, but he certainly has a reset button. he pushes it every 27 million years, when he’s sick and tired of the civilization on earth at that time. Or when the thing freezes. I’m not quite sure, but, have you seen the sky lately? or earth from space? It’s all blue! What if that is earth’s blue screen of doom? Quick, start polluting to make the blue go away, so God thinks that everything’s alright. Yeah, that’s right BP, you are doing an excellent job! 

In actuality this “God’s Reset Buton” is really a shower of comets through which earth passes every 27 million years. During this period, earth is bombarded with thousands of comets that wipe most of life on earth, causing mass  extinctions.

Hit the break for more details on how it really works.

Unfortunately for our planet, it passes through a shower of comets every 27 million years, and it very rarely escapes unscathed.

Of the last 20 times we made a galactic run for our lives through the comet shower, Earth only escaped with most of its biological organisms intact six times.

The most widely publicised one was 65 million years ago, when a 15km wide asteroid hit the Earth in Mexico with the force of a billion atomic bombs and wiped out the dinosaurs.

There’s also more bad news – the extinction scenario rate is not strictly accurate.

Sometimes the asteroids ambush all life on Earth up to 10 million years earlier than they should.

The good news is all on the side of our Sun’s dark twin Nemesis, which until now received an unfairly large proportion of bad press, being considered responsible for the bombardment.

Now, for those who have no idea WTF is the quote block talking about, the official theory about this scheduled mass extinctions before the God’s reset button comet shower theory was that our sun had an evil red dwarf twin a few light years away orbiting the sun in a highly elliptical orbit, that causes certain gravitational pull/disturbance on a cloud of comets and asteroids called the Oort Cloud as it passes near it, which is in turn projected towards us. (For more info check the Wikipedia article about Nemesis)

Now scientists say that because the extinction scenarios happen so regularly, Nemesis couldn’t be responsible, as its orbit would have changed over such a long time.

Which isn’t to say the Sun’s evil twin – which lies about one light year away from it – is not still spraying Oort cloud comets all over our galaxy, just that they’re hitting other planets these days.

Now that is scary. But I am kinda confused. You see, I wrote an post not too long ago, about BP being the partial responsible for the next mass extinction, which might happen anytime now BTW. In that post, I quoted the original article that said:

There was another mass extinction event 55 million years after that, referred to as the Late Paleocene Thermal Maximum, which lasted 100,000 years and was caused by an exploding methane bubble. Guess where it all went down? The ancient waters around where we now call the Gulf of Mexico.

Are this extinction events related or one and the same? or the scientists just can’t agree on what the hell is causing all life on this miserable little planet to die every 27 million years. How about God’s reset button!!!!

Or maybe this methane bubble was caused by a comet/meteor shower that ruptured the ground letting out gas trapped underneath it? Perhaps there is neither a comet shower nor a gas bubble, maybe the civilization on earth at that moment  just annihilated itself and everything else with nuclear weapons and pollution. Just something to think about.

Click HERE to visit news.com.au to read more about this while I press the reset button one more time (Mom’s coming!).

Illustration courtesy of Armando, from ReDCroW design.