Fourth of July fireworks behind the Washington Monument
Unnecessarily phallic photo courtesy of digitaljournal.com

Ever seen that movie “Independence Day”? The one with Will Smith and Jeff Goldblum? Well, according to some rumors across the web, July 4th might be the day we finally make contact. Just like in that movie! Question is: Is this really going to happen? Or it’s just a big stinky pile of BS like the end of the world in 1997…  and 1999…  and 2000… and 2006… And basically all the other “ends of the world” that were prophetized throughout the years, cause you know, WE ARE STILL HERE!!! Anyway, Could this be another case of lousy prediction? Only time will tell, for now my concerns are, if we are really expecting visitors from outer space, what are their intentions? Are we going to get blasted with a giant-ass laser like in the movie? If they are like us, then we probably are royally screwed.

Hit the break to read more and get paranoid!

It appears that some people believe the fireworks are a signal to extraterrestrials, drawing them to Earth to help celebrate the anniversary. Clark said there has not been confirmation from major media sources that aliens from outer space would attempt to contact Americans on July 4th. The way to get ready for contact with aliens, Clark advises his readers, readers

| “… is to read alien books and watch popular films which portray aliens.”

Internet chatter on the upcoming 234th celebration of the Independence of the United States is building as the day draws closer. Reflecting the tensions being experienced Americans, some sources are predicting a hostile encounter with extraterrestrials, while others are pointing to a more earth-bound crisis.

So there you have it folks, the opinions on whether or not we are going to get blasted to hell by hostile aliens are polarized and while in my very own, humble opinion, whoever is spreading this rumor have seen a bit too much Hollywood, maybe it’s true, you never know but I mean, c’mon… really? 4th of July?? Why exactly that day? If fireworks were a signal for them, then aliens would have contacted us already because in May 9th, Russia launched a record breaking amount of 4,500 fireworks during the Victory Day festivities held in Moscow! And if we are talking about signals for extraterrestrials what better signal than an atomic bomb? A nuclear explosion makes look any fireworks show like a god damn flashlight with low batteries in the darkness of a pitch-black cavern and we’ve been making nuclear tests since the 50′s. And all that is, making no mention of the fact that some scientists an other people who have nothing better to do point powerful lasers, carbon arc searchlights and other bright-as-shit gizmos into the sky. So if that doesn’t catch your attention from a galaxy far, far away I don’t know what will. Really, I don’t.
Just in case though, I would stay inside the bunker the July 4th if I were you. Forewarned is forearmed.

Visit digitaljournal.com to read more about the whole thing: Will extraterrestrials help celebrate America’s Independence Day

While you read I will be scared shitless, trembling under my reinforced steel table. Yes, I reinforced the damn thing, the bunker is not enough for me and the table adds yet ANOTHER layer of protection… That is, unless a big-ass comet pulverize the earth.